Okay, tomorrow I am 18 weeks along, and definitely feeling better again. Like myself. But very, very opinionated and with a short fuse. The sickness was apparently replaced with sudden annoyance at everything and everyone! Yikes. I was going to try to stay off my blog, but hey, that's what the Internet is for, right? To post angry thoughts directed a cyber space? So the question is--did you make my sh*t list? Read on to find out...and brace yourself.
People That Live In Minnesota (and the general north) And Hate Snow:
Okay, seriously. Look around you. Check your GPS coordinates. You know what country are close to up here? No, it's not Mexico. It's CANADA, mother f---ers! CANADA! Which is not known for its tropical temperatures! They don't call it the Arctic Tunda for nothing. So you live next to Canada. That means in October--May, we should not be surprised when it snows. And we should not whine and complain when it does (or say how much we love it when it does not.) If you really hate winter that much, here's a really simple solution. MOVE!!!!!!!
Teen Mom 2:
I don't watch this show with a whole lot of regularity, so I'm not sure of everyone's names. But that Joe kid who is dating the blond girl, who is whining that he has to pay child support? GET OVER IT! You created a child. She's let you off the hook this long without paying a dime, and you live with your mother f---ing parents and she's on her own. Grow a pair. Funny thing about kids, is when you make one, you have to pay for it. If you didn't want to pay for child support, then you should have kept your dick in your pants!
Janelle...wow. I have almost no words. That idiot you call a boyfriend is using you. He's a manipulative loser. I know because I've dated one. WALK AWAY. But you never do, every time he says he wants you back you just go crawling back, even though he's abusive. Seriously. You probably don't care because all you want to do is smoke weed. I feel bad for your son, you've got to be somewhere on the list of The Worst Mothers Ever.
True Life: I'm A Sex Offender:
I am all about forgiving people that make a mistake once. Who hasn't screwed up once? Who hasn't driven drunk or done drugs or had sex with a fourteen year old? The thing is, when you make the same mistake twice, you're just an idiot. This eighteen year old kid had sex with his fifteen year old girlfriend, then they broke up and he got arrested. Okay, you made a naughty. You learned your lesson, right? Wrong. He turned around the next year and fooled around with a fourteen year old. With his dick. He got caught. Now, I don't feel bad for you. Now you're just an idiot. But now I know about the punishments for sex offenders. And the sad thing is, they're good for real sex offenders, who probably never follow them because they're bad people and they don't care. But when you've an 18 year old who had sex with his fifteen year old girlfriend, they're way to strict. This kid is following the sentence because he doesn't want to get in trouble again. That's not fair. Something needs to change.
Packer Fans:
It's funny to me that the Packer fans spent two seasons ripping on everyone else's football team, tooting their own horns. But as soon as they lose, (and they can't even admit that it was in the first round, because it wasn't a wild card game--seriously that's lame. It was their first playoff game and they blew it. Get over it) they can't stand to have anyone else making fun of them. So you can dish out all the crap you want, but you can't take it back? Grow a pair.
Lauren Scruggs:
This one is touchy, because everyone seems to feel really bad for this girl. And I admit, she seems like a really nice girl. I almost feel bad for writing this. Almost. If you're not sure who I'm talking about, she's the model/blogger who walked into a moving plane propeller. Google it. I felt bad for her at first, but at the same time I was going "who is stupid enough to walk into a moving plane propeller?" She is, apparently. Isn't this a common sense thing? It's not like she's five years old. This plane has a propeller on the front. That is how it flies. It doesn't fly on wishes and rainbows. So when the plane is running, I should stay far away from the propeller and the front of the plane. Isn't that how someone with half a brain would think? And now we find out that the pilot TOLD her to walk around the back of the plane, actually reached out of the window of the plane and grabbed her arm and told her to stay away from that propeller! How much more does a person need? This isn't like a hot stove when you're a kid "don't touch, that's hot!" and you touch it anyway and get a painful blister. She lost an eye and an arm. Did she really have to learn that lesson the hard way? Couldn't she just have listened to the pilot and common sense? But I guess not everyone has common sense. That's why there are democrats, right?
Paula Dean:
I am so horrified that everyone is so angry at this woman for hiding the fact that she has type 2 diabetes. SO WHAT? She made her lifestyle choices, she never put a gun to anyone's head and said "eat my food every single day." The common sense thing plays in here again. Obviously her food is not the healthiest. She's not telling you to eat it all the time, you have to figure out that you shouldn't eat it every day. But we live in a society that lives on fast food--McDonalds, and I'm not even going to tell you what I learned about mechanically separated chicken parts yesterday. Let's just say even if I could eat chicken nuggets and patties, I would not. Tonight, the Travel Channel had a special called "State Fair Food." Pretty much everything was deep fried. There was deep fried beer, deep fried bacon, Krispy Kreme cheeseburger with chocolate bacon, and even deep fried butter! And people are mad at Paula Dean? Americans are fat, sick and lazy! So why are we coming down on Paula Dean for having a fattening cooking show? You bunch of hypocrites!!! Stop blaming everyone else for your problems and look down your own damn pie hole! No one is force feeding you. The government could probably stop this but they want everyone sick and dead so they don't care. And honestly, I don't want them to stop this because they need to stay out of our lives. People need to start making their own decisions. The joke that is the FDA needs to start doing it's job. I'm not even going to get into it, because it would take another blog, but our FDA is terrible. Cook your own food and use your stupid brain!
American Idol & Jersey Shore:
Die. Seriously. I hate you. AI is old and tired and sad. No one cares anymore. Jersey Shore is a picture of everything that is wrong with this country. It has made me never, ever want to visit the east coast. They're like orange animals. Can we please go back to sitcoms? Where we're not just relying on putting people who hate each other together to make drama? Yes it can be a guilty pleasure, but it really is lazy. There's tons of people in Hollywood who want to be writers. Can someone please write something that is better than this crap? Like House. I love House. And supposedly it's not coming back. Sad days.
SOPA:
Yet another reason for me to write this post. Because if this bill goes through, I might not be able to? The government could shut down my blog with no rhyme or reason if it feels as though I am using material that is pirated? That's a lot of crap. No one wants their stuff stolen, I get that, but this is way too far. Once again the government needs to stay the f-- out of it.
My Husband:
Who right now thinks he knows everything. Just kidding, sweetie. But seriously. Shut up.
And now, to balance this out a bit, a few of the things I love:
Skittles
Olives
House (Dr. Greg House is hot)
NY Ink (I love Chris Torres and Meghan Massacre together. I want more about this relationship (or lack their of? Can we please answer this?))
My dog
My computer
Writing
My job
The Oatmeal
and Three Lakes, of course!
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